On the Passing of Farrah Faucett & Michael Jackson
Two American Icons
Why Did the Passing of Farrah Fawcett and Michael Jackson Touch Us So Deeply?
By Dr. Jeanine Life Coach for Women Wordwide
Because I am in my 40s now, I have a clear recollection of watching the Jackson 5 on television in the 1970s. Anyone who saw Michael Jackson sing and dance his little heart out knew they were witnessing a true genius and a great talent. The adorable little boy who stood apart and in front of his older brothers on stage and subsequently captivated our hearts was clearly headed for superstardom.
There were many more subtle factors that touched me about Michael. Aside from being a really cute boy, the songs he sang provided a narrative for my own development, teaching me about love. The songs “Stop the Love You Save”, “I’ll Be There" and “I Want You Back” offered me clues about the nuances of relationships. His unique talent modeled for me what was possible and was a shinning example of human potential even at an early age. I listened to my Jackson 5 album and eight track tape until my record was too scratched to listen to and the 8 track player became obsolete.
My college boyfriend bought me the Thriller album and being a dancer I tried to figure out the Thriller chorography for fun. Thriller was a phenomenon and once again put the bright spotlight back on now adult Michael. It was then that “The King of Pop” moniker began to take hold. For me, the “Black or White” song became an anthem for my inter-racial relationship and “Man in the Mirror” provided heartfelt lyrics for the social changes I passionately wanted to make as a social worker. "The Way You Make Me Feel" still makes me smile and excites for me those feelings of being in love.
Sadly, as a social worker for the LA County Department of Mental Health, I remember the surreal buzz around the accusations made towards Michael who by then had become enigmatic and reclusive. In the office, I would overhear details of the investigations which always left me feeling disconcerted. Unfortunately, the song “Leave Me Alone” seemed to say it all and its lyrics shared little in common with the innocent and idealistic lyrics I once heard from the Jackson 5.
Similarly, Farrah Fawcett was a huge beauty icon for all of us in the 70s. I didn’t know any 13 year old girls that didn’t in some way try to copy the Farrah feathered hair style. In earnest, I took a photo of Farrah to my hairstylist who offered to create a variation of the Farrah hairstyle for me. I was completely deflated at the thought that my hair could not be made to resemble Farrah’s exactly. I felt burdened by the injustice of it. I didn’t have blond hair, thick hair or wavy hair, which made my morning efforts with the curling iron laborious. I admit that I stayed home from school on several occasions simply because I couldn’t get the Farrah feathered hair down. At my school, when having a particularly good hair day it was customary to compliment your friend by approaching her with a simple “Farrah”. In the late 70s at my junior high school a loftier compliment would be hard to think of.
Farrah impacted our idea of beauty in the 70s as those before us had thought of Marilyn Monroe in the 50s and 60s. What was it that we were all were so captivated by and made us so covetous? Arguably, there were other actresses and personalities more physically beautiful. Feature for feature fellow Charlie’s Angel Jaclyn Smith was perhaps prettier, but she didn’t enliven our spirits or spark our imagination like the big grinned beauty sitting in front of the striped Mexican blanket. For me at least, it was in part the indomitable spirit which jumped off the television screen. During her one season of Charlie’s Angels her character Jill Monroe reached out to us with her blinding smile, bouncing mane of hair and her tanned, carefree and fit California girl (although a Texan) good looks.
It wasn’t just the Charlie’s Angel’s Farrah with her overt sensuality that caught my attention. Two of Farrah’s movies touched me deeply: Extremities and The Burning Bed. The movie Extremities helped me deal with some of my own personal traumas by providing a context to help me grapple with feelings of victimization and retribution. I was riveted by The Burning Bed specifically because it spoke to the plight of so many disempowered women who have to make impossible choices. The stories that she choose to tell were deeply thought provoking and moving. Farrah was always appreciated as beautiful, but following her performance in these movies there was a deeper appreciation for her as a talented and intelligent actress as well.
The recent Farrah’s Story chronicling Farrah’s cancer challenges I felt showed Farrah at her most beautiful. At 60+, she was truly more radiant and luminous than ever. Whether she was having a snowball fight with Alana Stewart at a cancer treatment center in Germany, celebrating a final Christmas with Marianne Williamson or even shaving off her beautiful trademark locks, she glowed just as she did in the 1970s. As I always suspected, her beauty was really about the radiant energy she projected outward and had much less to do with standards of beauty.
Most of us were shaken up on Thursday June 25th 2009 when Farrah Fawcett and Michael Jackson passed away. Many of us felt we had lost some important reference points, two people who had awakened and inspired something in ourselves. Our histories seemed entangled. Somehow these iconic figures became a part of our personal narrative. Like anyone we know well we knew they weren’t perfect people and didn’t have perfect lives. What many of us will choose to focus on is what they added to our lives. Perhaps this is an opportunity to really appreciate all those around us who offer something to smile about.
